Identifying Signs

Self Harm is purposeful self injury from destructive behaviors such as:

• Burning skin with matches, candles, cigarettes, etc
• Carving words, patterns, or symbols in the skin
• Cutting or Scratching their skin
• Head-banging, typically into a wall
• Hitting, punching, or biting themselves

Physical Signs

• Avoiding activities that expose their body like swimming
• Reporting frequent “accidents” to explain scars
• Unexplained blood on clothing
• Wearing long sleeves/pants in hot weather to cover scars
• Wearing bandages frequently

NOTE: Self Harm is NOT Always an indicator for suicide, but should always be taken just as seriously

What to do if your friend is Self Harming

• Approach them privately
• Ensure your own emotions are checked ahead of time
  • Don’t punish them or react with anger – it may push them away
• Emphasize that you’re not angry and that you just want to help
• Give them space to talk and explain why they’ve been feeling the way they have been and what triggers them to self harm
  • Be non-judgemental – just listen; it can be incredibly embarrassing or a very sensitive subject and often people just want to be heard, not to have their problems fixed right away
• Help them learn and guide them towards utilizing healthy coping mechanisms
• For Example:
  • Running their hands under cold water
  • Screaming into a pillow
  • Calling a mental health hotline or text HOME to 741741 to talk to someone
  • Exercising/going outside
  • Listening to music
  • Call a Friend
  • Deep Breathing exercises 
  • Eating sour or spicy candies
  • Drawing or painting red lines or butterflies on the skin where they want to injure
    • For more information see the Self Harm Butterfly Project
• Support and encourage them to seek professional help

Afterwards

• Check up on them
• Remind them of coping strategies
• Have Patience, recovery can take a long time and being there to support them is invaluable

The Self Harm Butterfly Project

The rules are simple:

• When you feel the urge to self-harm, draw a butterfly on your arm, hand, or location that you are compelled to hurt
• Name the butterfly after a loved one or supporter
• Let the butterfly fade naturally, no scrubbing it off
• If you self-harm before the butterfly is gone, the butterfly “dies,” so the goal is to help it live
• Another person may draw them on you. These butterflies are extra special and should be handled with extra care
• If you don’t self-harm, draw a butterfly on yourself to show support. In this case, name the butterfly after the person you are supporting